I’m going to start off today’s blog by saying……. “I know”.
I know that it’s been a LONG time since you’ve all heard from me.
I also know that your life is not complete without my stories.
I can only imagine that you’ve probably gone into SERIOUS withdrawals and have possibly had to turn to other sources for entertainment such as Netflix, or reading books that are not at all as tantalizing or enriching as my blog. Or perhaps you’ve even felt compelled to turn to the negativity of…..dare I say it…..the NEWS!? I hope to goodness you haven’t.
But regardless, I’m really sorry for the time I have been away and for the consequences you have had to endure as a result of my recent sabbatical.
But guyssssss, I needed a BREAK!
Since I last wrote for you, it was not long after my invasive knee surgery……..which I have since learned was actually a REALLY big deal.
You see, many surgeries in which the knee is injured, the surgeon just goes in and cuts away the torn bits and pieces, and then you’re all ready to go! Lickity split, Barbara Trick!! In MY case however, my surgeon had to COMPLETELY REBUILD my ACL using ligaments taken from my hamstring. I’ll pause for a moment while you let the grandeur of such a surgery sink in.
Ok, you good?
Awesome!
Let’s continue then….
Anyway, the rehab for my knee, as you can imagine, was NOT pleasant.
I’ll be honest……I cried in my car after the first 3 physiotherapy sessions.
The pain was so excruciating and yet I was expected to work out so soon after my surgery!?? It made no sense to me!
I mean….it was a light workout…..mostly stretching and icing …..but STILL.
I’ll never forget, on my third visit, when my therapist asked me to try the Elliptical for the first time. The elliptical!!?? Who did she think I was? Iron Man???
Or the time when she sat me down and asked me what my “goals for recovery were”?
I stared at her with a blank face, for like, a really long time. And then I answered slowly in a whisper, “to….recover…??”.
My tough as nails physiotherapist answered quickly with “Right, I know. But what are your sports goals??”
Again I stared at her, this time trying my hardest to suppress an eye roll. “I don’t do any sports” I answered meekly.
Before I finished the word “sports”, she was already talking again, “Right, but is it your goal to get back to running? Or hiking? Or biking?”
The urge to roll my eyes was soooo powerful now, I could barely hold it in. But I did, thank God. It was then that I finally blurted out, “I’m a single mom. All I want is to have a working knee so that I can go up and down the stairs with a full laundry basket of kid’s clothes.”
It was now Andrea my therapist who stared at me blankly.
I honestly don’t think she had ever come across a 40-something in her gym who not only didn’t work out…..but who also had no future goals to do so.
Andrea clearly saw that she wasn’t getting anywhere with me, so she finally gave up on the “question/answer portion” of our session and left me to tend to her other patients.
I looked over at the other patients. It was then that I noticed how fit and healthy they all looked, despite similar recent surgeries, all done by the handsome surgeon himself, Dr.Korkola.
Gasp!! Had I gone to a surgeon who specialized in surgeries for ATHLETES!? How could I have made such a monumental mistake? Dammit!! I should’ve went to a surgeon who specialized in old, lazy people.
When I overheard Andrea and the “fit people” all talking about their “additional” exercise routines that they were doing on top of physio at their local fitness gyms, I could no longer hold it in.
And I turned around pretending to take a huge sip of water, but instead………. I let out the biggest eye roll ever.
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Weeks later, I’m proud to announce that I had finally made some new friends! :)
No, not with the fit people silly! I had absolutely NOTHING in common with them.
I made friends with patients that I could TRULY relate to. People that understood me, and people that were on the same page as me.
They were the seniors who just had hip replacement surgery!
Rose, Gertrude and Lyle became my new best friends! They were awesome. As we did our weekly stationary bike we talked of many important things……sales at Walmart, the weather……but mostly we just complained about how difficult and annoying these physiotherapy sessions were.
I was confident that Rose had tried to bolt a few times, because every time she meandered away from the machines, Andrea would say in a loud voice, “Rose! Where are you going???”
Rose would jump at Andrea’s voice and quickly say, “Just back to my bed for some stretching.” Her bed was always the one closest to the door.
Oh yeah….Rose was definitely a runner!
Rose looked at me, and we both smirked.
I loved my new friends!
But sadly, over the weeks that past, one by one, my new friends had finished their physio sessions, and I was left alone with the fit ones. Sigh. There was nothing left for me to do except work out :(
So I did.
I worked out as hard as my physiotherapist told me to.
And before long, I have to admit that I was actially keeping up with the fit ones? Who would have ever thought eh??
It got to the point where I ………..I’m embarrassed to say…………..even looked forward to the Elliptical machine!? And not only that. I was also up to 200 lbs on the leg press, running on the treadmill, and doing lunges in perfect form. It was like I had never even had surgery!? OMG, I HAD turned into Iron Man!!
And I have to say, I sort of even craved the workouts when I wasn’t doing them. I consistently looked forward to that next surge of adrenalin and serotonin! Who would have thought?? Maybe working out WASN’T a fad afterall??
It was now officially 3 months post-surgery and I was ready for my first strength test! This was a very intense and difficult test that I had to do to determine how much of my original strength I had acquired back in my surgery leg.
Well, I’m proud to say that I had scored in the 90th percentile! My surgeon was proud of me, my physiotherapist was proud of me, but above all…………I was proud of ME!!
I had lost weight, I was gaining muscle and I felt strong and amazing.
But ………then the unthinkable happened.
Not long after the strength test, maybe 4 days after, my knee had swollen to double the size L I waited for it to go back to normal, but after 2 weeks of intense pain, limited movement, and ongoing inflammation, my surgeon had advised that I stop all weight-bearing and high-impact exercising.
I looked at my handsome surgeon with pure sadness, “What do you mean???” I whined.
“I mean, you have to go back to square one. Pretend like you’re back to 2 weeks post-surgery: ice and stretching. That’s it.”
He saw the utter disappointment in my face and said, “Listen, it happens. You pushed it too hard, and your knee wasn’t ready. But don’t worry. You’ll get back to it in no time”.
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The following week, at physio, I was very depressed. Andrea tried to cheer me up as I lay on my bed with a massive bag of ice on my knee. But even her motivational talk couldn’t cheer me up. I just sighed as she went back to the fit ones.
Suddenly a newbie walked in. Actually, she rolled in. An old lady, must have been in her eighties, rolled in with her walker.
She looked at me and then at the bed beside me and said in a shaky old-lady voice “Is this one taken??”
I answered quietly, “No. Go ahead”.
The old lady shimmied onto the bed and immediately started talking to me.
“What are you here for? I’m here for some rehab or something. I just had hip surgery 3 weeks ago. I told the doctor that I was fine and I didn’t need to come here, but he made me, so here I am. I’m too old for this nonsense. Rehab? At my age! What do I need rehab for? Not like I’m going to run a marathon or anything! The only activity I do is shopping at Walmart, you don’t need rehab for that. Hey, did you see that rain out there?? What a miserable day. Oh, I’m Doris by the way….” And she stuck out her hand towards me.
For the first time in weeks, I felt happy about physio again.
I smiled the biggest smile as I stuck out my hand and said, “I’m Leo. It’s an absolute PLEASURE to meet you Doris. Let me show you around!”
;)
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