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Get rid of the floaters.





The other day I ran into an old friend.  

She asked how my separation was going.  I told her that it was still a challenge.  That the girls and I were still struggling financially, but that I was moving on and making things work.  And above all, I was happy again.

I guess that she was not satisfied with my answer, because she kept pressing.

"But, like what's going on right now?  Where is he living?  Do you ever talk to him?"

I tried to end the topic.  I shrugged my shoulders, looked up and gave a guttural laugh.

"It is what it is.  I'm fine.  Everything will work out."

 But she STILL wasn't satisfied.

 "Right....but isn't it SO hard??  Like....it's gonna take you YEARS to get over this.  And after everything he's done to you?  I mean.....it's soooo not fair......."

 As she went on and on....and on, I realized it was time to make my exit.  I was not interested in this conversation. 

 "Sorry, I just realized what time it is.  I gotta go.  I'll see you around."  

 I turned around quickly, rolled my eyes and went on my way.  But I could hear her disappointment as I left.

 "Oh!  Okay.  Well, no matter what I support you.  I got yer back girl!  I'll CALL YOU!  LET'S DO LUNCH ONE DAY!"  She yelled to make sure I heard her.  

But I was already in my van driving away. 




I couldn't stand people like this.  People that were only interested in the negativity and gossip.  These were the same people that yelled "I got yer back", but then ran to your ex and everyone else to tell them where they saw you, what you were doing, who you were with, and even what you were wearing. 

 As I drove away I thought to myself....well, another one bites the dust.



In the past 2 years, I've had to move on from several people like this.  Anyone who didn't support me 100% needed to go.  I couldn't have friends or acquaintances in my life that I didn't trust.    




When I first got separated, I remained friends with these people.  They said they supported me..... so why wouldn't I believe them? 

I soon realized though that these friends were just "floaters", floating between me and my ex, trying to get gossip and trying to figure out the entire story.  When I confronted one of them recently (in Walmart of all places), she tried to defend her side saying that she just wanted "the best for both of us".  

I didn't buy it.

 
Because the "best" for me was to move on and build a new life.  And somehow with these people, I was stuck in a world that revolved around my ex and my divorce.  It was very negative and very unhappy.  
In the past 2 years, after having separated not only from my ex, but also from these floaters, I have opened up my world to meeting a whole new group of people.  People focused not on my divorce or my old life or my ex's life, but rather on new adventures, positive energy and amazing journeys.  These are fun and amazing people who work hard and stay focused on living the best life possible.

And not surprisingly that none of them.....I repeat NONE are interested in gossip and drama and negativity.




Because at the end of the day, you can sit and wonder what's happening behind your neighbors' closed door......or you can go and open your own door and start living your own fabulous life.

I choose door #2 :)






 


























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