You question a lot of things when you're single and dating. Will I ever trust again? Will I ever get married again? And are there any good guys left out there?
I am still very much in a place where I don't really see myself settling down anytime soon. My head and heart are still reeling from a very messy separation which I continue to be dragged through, against all wishes. Add two incredibly active little daughters to the mix, and you don't really have any time to work on healing yourself.
But as the clouds in my life are slowly being lifted, I most definitely see a blue sky up ahead full of opportunities and success in my personal life and in my career. But when it comes to this future "man" in my life.....he is still a huge mystery. I think I see him.......but he is fuzzy. Charming, but still fuzzy.
The one thing I very often wonder, is how I will meet him?
As many of you know, when it comes to meeting men and flirting, I am incredibly awkward and a tad naive. As I've written about before, I have been completely unaware of guy friends who have liked me for years, but I would have never suspected it. In fact, it wasn't until I separated from my husband, that suddenly 4 very close guy friends asked me out on dates. I was shocked at my naivety and even more shocked that 3 out of these 4 men were at one point married to close friends of mine!
I have often been told that guys are either interested in me or just checking me out, but if it's too subtle, sadly, I won't notice at all.
Over the weekend, I went over to my neighbour's house for drinks. A delightful couple who I have gotten to know well over the past year of living in my cute, new town-home. They had invited over another couple, so the 5 of us sat until the wee hours of the morning drinking and sharing stories and laughing. We were making fun of the fact that our street is nick-named "Lovers Lane" because of all the divorcees, when Natalie asked me about my cute neighbor.
"Oh. Yeah. He's super cute! We chat all the time. But I think he has a girlfriend." I said while taking a sip of my delicious vodka drink.
"Aww, that's too bad" said Natalie's best friend Sonya.
"I hear he has a great job. Cute AND successful!" said Natalie with a wink.
"I know right? He came over with his daughters the other night for a play-date. I thought that was nice." I said while taking another sip.
Someone needs to take this drink out of my hand immediately.
"Wait. What??" asked Natalie's husband. "He came over? To your house?"
"Yeah. Why?" I stopped drinking to look up and see smirks all over my new friend's faces.
"Leo! He clearly likes you!" yelled Sonya.
"No he doesn't! He has a girlfriend!" And even though I said the words myself, suddenly I didn't believe them.
I have to admit. It did seem strange that he showed up that evening unannounced....... looking very handsome I might add.......
But I still wasn't sure. I needed a guy's perspective on this one.
I whipped my head towards Sonya's husband, "What do YOU think? You're a guy....AND a Dad. You would bring your kids over for a random playdate to your neighbor's house right?"
He started laughing. "Leo. The guy is into you. For sure. There's no question".
My eyes grew wide. And I couldn't help my lips from forming a little smirk.
Natalie laughed at my expression while taking the empty glass out of my hand and replacing it with another delicious Grey Goose concoction.
I'm still pretty confident that this cute neighbor of mine has a girlfriend, and until I confirm that he doesn't, this person is off-limits to me.
But I did leave Natalie's house feeling giddy.
How I could not see that this man may possibly be interested is beyond me. But that's the thing about me. I would never want to assume something and then be disappointed. I'd rather be slightly pessimistic and naive than be wanting something that might never be.
I walked the short distance to my home close to 2 o'clock in the morning. My head was spinning from the vodka drinks that Natalie "forced" me to have.
But somehow I managed to get home, wash my face, throw on some pj's and climb into bed.
I thought of my fabulous evening with some hilarious and great new friends.
The vodka drinks had caused my thoughts to be a little blurry.
But I couldn't help falling asleep with a smirk on my face.......thinking of a man ......
........who appeared to be a little less fuzzy ;)
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